Today’s home truth is borne of something I thought to myself earlier.  “Feelings are fickle.”
Sometimes I am a real list man and cross things off as they are done and enjoy a real feeling of accomplishment.  At other times despite a list I do not feel like doing anything.  I know I need to rest when my body tells me to rest.  Yet at other times I know my feelings are telling me something I do well to ignore.  I do things despite how I feel not because of how I feel.
There are undoubtedly times when I feel totally alone and unmotivated and wonder will I ever feel different again.  It reminds me of a time of drought in Townsville and I looked at the blue sky a and wondered if it would ever rain again.  It did.  Time goes quick, but in the midst of things sometimes it can seem time goes real slow.
It is amazing to me that I can be absorbed in something and the time seems to go by so fast.  I wonder to myself “where did that time go?”  While at other times it seems the clock has almost stopped and time drags.  Nothing is different except me and the way I feel.
That is why to me feelings are not my template.  I can be over the moon with excitement and I can be down in the dumps.  The way I feel is more to do with bio rhythms and news I get rather than the way things are. The person next to me can be as happy as Larry (Larry must have been a happy person) while I am the exact opposite - or it can be the other way around.
So to me it is important I look beyond my fleeting feelings to something more solid and secure.  I will not deny my feelings as they are the way I feel.  Yet I know the way I feel is temporary.  Whether I feel great or terrible the truth is constant.  When I feel bad, I know that all storms pass and I will feel different again. 

It is with sadness we announce the demise of “Fishy.”
It is with joy we announce the arrival of “Fishy.”
Ok admittedly we were a little shocked at the demise of our other fishy.  He had been looking so well.  Then he became lethargic and off his food.
This caused us to go to the fish shop looking for some substance that gets rid of bad bugs and stuff.  I so did not expect to hear the aquarium guy ask what he asked.  He said, “how old is it?”  We estimated going on two years (he was fully grown when we got him).
He then said the key was in that answer.  Their life span is approximately 2 – 4 years.  So his problem was likely to be old age getting him.
That was not the news we were expecting.  We got home and he was no better.  In fact he seemed worse and the next morning worse again.  He did not last the day.
What we had been told had caused me to look it up in that completely trustworthy and reliable source called google.  I learned a few things there.  The average life span of a Siamese Fighter depends on the age of the earth (did I say that or just think it?).  Err I mean their age.  It averages 2 – 4 years.  That is the shortest life span of a fish I have ever had.  But there it was in black and white.  Oh and there was a colour photo.
Merril and I were grieving but trying to remain strong (there is one school of thought that says he would have come back as something else.  Who knows he could be an even gooder fish.  That is maybe not what is meant, but I am not ruling out a work in progress here.)
We did a total clean of everything that was in the tank and replaced the water.  We were excited about getting a replacement fish.  In fact so excited that we went to the aquarium store.  It was closed for the public holiday.  But google had told me it was open.  It had lied to me.  So much for reliability.
We wanted a blue fish this time.  Good thing too I reckon cause Google had told me that the colour enhancing food we give it, actually improves blue Siamese Fighters immunity.  And the reliability of Google is legendary.
Anyway day one.  He seems happy.  And he is little.  In fact, his name could be “little fishy” as opposed to the other one who’s name was “fishy.”  But depending on how long he is with us, “Little Fishy” will one day not be right. 
So “Fishy” it is.  We are not confused.   And it is a good start.

On a couple of occasions I have heard someone say something like, “love me or hate me but don’t ignore me.”
I was thinking about that this morning and it seems to me ignoring another is a dangerous thing to do.  No wonder ignorance has ignore look to be related.  Countries and teams have come undone as a result of ignoring another.
Ignoring can allow another free rein to put in place what can be another’s undoing.  How often I have heard the term “thy flew under the radar.”  That to me says I was busy concentrating on another and ignored a potential threat.
So often the threat posed is not big and obvious.  The big and obvious are generally the ones I gravitate to.  Maybe rightly so - but not at the expense of vigilance.  It can be the little things that trip me up.
I look at health and safety a lot. Particularly since the stroke I am looking out big time for trip hazards.  They tend to not be large but are ignored to my detriment.  Being tripped up brings me down.  The tripping itself can do me damage and once down I am vulnerable.  So I reckon it behoves me to deal with what is obvious while keeping an eye on what is not.
Refusing to ignore not only provides safety for me but also has the potential to provide what I need.  They reckon to be successful study the successful.
That to me is excellent advice and alleviates me of needing to invent the wheel all the time.  Others have gone before and found success.  Often good ways of doing things are built upon, so for me there is a pathway I should follow.
So I reckon I can learn a lot whether I am loved, hated or ignored.  But when it comes to me I should never ignore.  To not ignore something does not mean I exalt it, but it does mean I keep an eye on it and ensure it does not become a future stumbling block.