Forgive

Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.”  C.S. Lewis
“Bob Hoover was a famous test pilot and a frequent performer at air shows. 
Once when he returned to his home in Los Angeles from an air show in San Diego, both engines of his World War Two propeller plane suddenly stopped.  With skill and a lot of luck he safely landed the plane without injury to himself or the other two passengers. 
After the emergency landing he inspected the airplane’s fuel.  As he suspected the plane had been filled with jet fuel rather than gasoline.  He then asked to see the mechanic who serviced his plan. 
The mechanic, horrified at the prospect of seeing the man he had nearly killed, anticipated the full force of Hoovers anger.
But Hoover put his arm around the mechanic and said, “To show you I’m sure you will never do this again, I want you to service my F-51 tomorrow.” 
There is no doubt in my mind that forgiveness is hard.  I find this especially so when what is forgiven is something that has had a big impact on me or those close to me.
What I do find though is not forgiving has an even bigger impact on me.  I do not know how often I have heard of those who have something to forgive, struggling while the perpetrator continues on totally unaware of the dilemma.
I may feel vindication is justified.  Yet I know there is very limited, temporary satisfaction in that.  I do not reckon my pain justifies my inflicting pain on another.
This seems to run contrary to accepted wisdom yet to me accepted wisdom is not always right.  My and the experience of many seem to fly in the face of that thought.  Naturally there are unique circumstances, but to me exceptions do not negate the rule.
But having said that, it is so much it is easier to say than to do.  I sure need help with that one.