Care

Well for sure this is different.  I was put onto it through the weekly James Clear email.  I so did not expect to be travelling this road.  Yet what I read sent me scurrying to find out more.
It was to do with rubber gloves – their invention.  I will put word for word what I read.  “Playwright and poet Sarah Ruhl on love as a creative force:  "There was once a very great American surgeon named Halsted. He was married to a nurse. He loved her—immeasurably.  One day Halsted noticed that his wife's hands were chapped and red when she came back from surgery. And so he invented rubber gloves. For her. It is one of the great love stories in medicine. The difference between inspired medicine and uninspired medicine is love...  [He] loved her to the point of invention."
Rubber gloves have evolved since then and are better than they once were, but for me what stood out was the motivation that led to the invention of the first rubber gloves.
That story was built on what I regard as really important.  Care born of love.  I often encourage others to get a second opinion as too often an original diagnosis seems to not to come from “care for another” but “care for oneself.”  That to me is at best useless and at worst dangerous.  A saying of mine is “no one cares about me like I care about me.”  My experience is sometimes that can be taken to the extreme and another’s lack of care about me can cost me big time.
But in this instance care born of love is on display.  What is obvious is that people see through insincerity and people gravitate to sincerity.  It is obvious to me when someone cares or they don’t.
To know someone I study them in the longer term.  It is what is produced that tells me the story and not what is said alone.
For me personally I am willing to put up with some things when I know that the motivation towards me is care.  Some things can be gotten wrong, and many can be gotten right.  For me the difference is motivation.  If I know someone cares, I will take the journey with them.