The Chicken or the Egg

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?  Personally I reckon the chicken did, but there would be an equal number of people who would reckon the egg came first and present a strong case for it.
I think we have all heard about letting whatever is inside an egg crack the shell open themselves.  It is a part of their strengthening process, and no matter how well-meaning we are, assisting it is counterproductive for the eggs inhabitant.
It will certainly not look like I have done any harm initially, but when push comes to shove, the eggs former inhabitant will not have the strength it needs.  I have had a parent say to me, that no matter where their child goes, a part of their own heart is there to. 
We can make love deceptive.  What looks like love isn’t.  So often I want to fight another’s battle for them.  I would personally prefer to be the fall guy.  We see this regularly in movies.  Someone confesses for something someone else did.
Sometimes watching someone fall over and get their hands dirty is the best thing I can do for that person.  It is never nice to watch when I care, and I should always be there for the person if asked for, but in the end, it is best for that person’s own development to find out things for themselves, no matter how hard I find it.
I had a friend who with his wife was a carer.  That is, they had several younger people in their charge.  He was firm but fair.  Their charges knew they were loved, but the rule was if they went out, they had to find their own way home.  They all knew it.  Late one night he got a phone call. His charges were miles away and needed a lift home.  Because everyone knew the rule they were denied.  They needed to find their own way home.  They did, but my friends wife said it was one of the hardest things they ever had to do.  They loved their charges and in this case what was needed was tough love. To me, to not do it, would have been like a breach in a dam.  From then on, that would have been the way to do it.  Need a lift?  Call home.  Because of the outcome, that was not considered an option. Easy to say, harder to do.
So often I think breaking open the egg is helping its inhabitant.  In the short term it sure looks that way.  In the long term it does not help.  Even when I want the best for the inhabitant, they need to be able to learn from their own successes and failures.  We rejoice with successes and commiserate about failures.  The good point is, either way it is theirs.