Selfishness

There has been one question I have been asking myself since I wrote what I wrote yesterday.  It is the question “is selfishness ever right?”  It was brought on by such examples of a guy protecting his wife. 
Someone has said after responding to a mass shooting it is amazing how often guys are found over women protecting them.  I think wholeheartedly efforts need to be made to protect those around me, and protect what is important to me whether people or possessions.
Is that a selfish act?  I do not come at this as one knowing but as one seeking to know.  I have come to certain conclusions based on what I have read and what I think.
I reckon it is really important to define selfishness so I know what I mean when I use the term.  As is so often the case the Merriam-Webster is my dictionary of choice.  I have looked it up in other dictionaries but they say basically the same thing. “concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others…”
On that basis I do not think seeking to protect my own is a selfish act.  My concern is for myself yes, but not myself exclusively.  My concern is for others as well.
It all has to do with motivation though.  I can be selfish performing a seemingly selfless act.  What I do may seem noble while the whole time it is done to protect what I regard as exclusively mine, without though for another who may be regarded as mine. 
As Switchfoot sing, “this skin and bone is a rental.”  At best what I have, I have been granted by another the use of.  I have no control over my birth, and death is my lot.  But even death is a comma and not a full stop.  Motivations live on.
While I believe wholeheartedly in a world to come, what I am seeking to answer here has to do with potential selfishness in the world I live in now.
I do not think I need to be a Rhodes scholar to think some motivation from world leaders is born out of selfishness.  So often leaders do things that they  perceive will benefit themselves.  Even gathering people around of like mind is a selfish act to propagate themselves only.  Selflessness is not the motivation.  Self interest is.  Some benefit and most suffer.
But I do not think for a moment selfishness is the exclusive domain of the powerful.  Anyone is capable of selfishness.  Selfishness may be one motivation, but it is exhibited in many forms.  Millions may be affected, or just my neighbour.  The result is the same.  I am responsible for needless suffering.
I am capable of it in an instant.  Selfishness is my default position.  Even my most noble act can be flawed depending on my motivation.  Boy do I need help.
To me in selflessness, everyone (including myself) benefits, except wrong doers.