Number One

Merril said something before that made me think, “I want to investigate that further.”  She showed me a picture and said, “how old do you think that person is?”  If I had not seen Dolly Parton on TV last night I would have thought the person was in their 40’s.  She was 74.  She looked great.  What Merril said was “if you spend your whole life working on how you look, it is not much of a life.”
Women in particular seem to concentrate on their looks.  We men can be grubs.  How I look matters less than doing what I am doing.  But everyone can have other issues too.  Like spending an inordinate amount of time concentrating on the job, or money, or hobby, or chasing other women.
I will always try to look appropriate for the occasion, but there is a good chance that what I deem appropriate may differ to what another thinks is.  In that case I am happy to conform as I never want what is ok for me to cause someone else bad issues.
Besides for me to make what I look like my number one priority is probably a waste of time.  I am what I am.  Get used to it.
To me there are heaps of things I make my number one priority.   Anyone who knows me knows I am big on balance.  I need a number one priority, but I question it if my number one causes me to neglect other things that are important.  To me no number one priority is worth it if it leaves others the poorer.  My actions should never cause permanent harm to another.
I grew up around a certain amount of disfunction.  I have a certain amount of disfunction.  I am not perfect.  Sorry to break it to you, but neither are you.  If that is news to you it is probably best it is written on a page and you can consider the ramifications.
Both my parents were involved in activities which they enjoyed immensely, but which caused neglect or the belief that something that was, was the way it had to be.  Maybe they knew and maybe they didn’t.  Or maybe they chose to ignore it.  I don’t know, but I loved them to bits.  Fortunately, damage is only permanent if I choose it to be that way.
Whatever is my number one priority is like an addiction.  Not a physical one but a mental one.  Some physical addictions are good for me (for want of a better word).  I need sleep.  If I am not getting enough, my body craves it until satisfied.  I also need food.  I learned that big time when I was by myself and had neglected food.  Suddenly food became all important.  My body told me it could not go on without it and if it can’t, I can’t.  I found out around then that carrots are only so good for so long.  I thought I was being real organized.  I am sure there were other elements in it, but I distinctly remember the carrots.  Time after time carrots featured in my diet.  I grew to despise carrots.  I am over that now, but the memory lingers.
What I choose to be my number one priority matters, and has implications not just for me but others.  Good choices never fail to help.