Motives

​The inclination is “look at me, look at me.” I laugh when I hear it. It is not something that is generally said, but it is something that is regularly thought.

Often when I do a good deed for someone, I want them to know it. It may have cost me in other ways, but at the very least it has cost me in time and effort. I want them to know that and appreciate it. And to feel free to reciprocate. I’ll deny it for sure, but the unwritten rule is they owe me. But what I am doing has a limited life span. Good chance I won’t keep on doing it if I see it is like water off a duck’s back. If I don’t see it is having any affect, I will give it away. I have other things to do with my time and this seems like a waste of time.

It seems to me the real test is thinking “don’t look at me, don’t look at me.” The test for me is to make the act as hidden as possible. To have people say, “who did this?”

To me it all comes back to motive. Sometimes it is right that I make obvious I can do something. When going for a job, it is important that the ones who can give me the job know I can do the job.

I reckon I would have made a good tradies assistant. It is important to me the environment work is being carried out in, is as clear as it needs to be. A guy was cleaning the roof next door. He needed power. Merril and I willing let him use ours. When it came to plugging in the chord, handing it over the fence and turning on the power, I told him the whole time what I was doing. He thanked me for that. To me, when it comes to life and death, assumptions don’t cut it. I am big on having anything that does not contribute to the job at hand, out of the way.

Yet at other times it is important only that the job gets done. It does not matter who did it. Maybe that is known, and maybe it is not. But if I did it and there is a mistake, I do need to fess up. The buck may stop with someone else, but the buck has been through my hands. But if it is right then in this case what they don’t know will not hurt them. To me, the credit is in the job being done, not in who did it.

There is no doubt in my mind, that if I want something known, the reward is immediate. If I manage to do something and it is not known who did it, my reward is in the act itself and any possible future reward will need to wait. I often say I am not responsible for the actions of others, but I am responsible for mine.

I find that coming at it this way, means I am not dependent on the actions of other people. I do not do things Motives
The inclination is “look at me, look at me.” I laugh when I hear it. It is not something that is generally said, but it is something that is regularly thought.
Often when I do a good deed for someone, I want them to know it. It may have cost me in other ways, but at the very least it has cost me in time and effort. I want them to know that and appreciate it. And to feel free to reciprocate. I’ll deny it for sure, but the unwritten rule is they owe me. But what I am doing has a limited life span. Good chance I won’t keep on doing it if I see it is like water off a duck’s back. If I don’t see it is having any affect, I will give it away. I have other things to do with my time and this seems like a waste of time.
It seems to me the real test is thinking “don’t look at me, don’t look at me.” The test for me is to make the act as hidden as possible. To have people say, “who did this?”
To me it all comes back to motive. Sometimes it is right that I make obvious I can do something. When going for a job, it is important that the ones who can give me the job know I can do the job.
I reckon I would have made a good tradies assistant. It is important to me the environment work is being carried out in, is as clear as it needs to be. A guy was cleaning the roof next door. He needed power. Merril and I willing let him use ours. When it came to plugging in the chord, handing it over the fence and turning on the power, I told him the whole time what I was doing. He thanked me for that. To me, when it comes to life and death, assumptions don’t cut it. I am big on having anything that does not contribute to the job at hand, out of the way.
Yet at other times it is important only that the job gets done. It does not matter who did it. Maybe that is known, and maybe it is not. But if I did it and there is a mistake, I do need to fess up. The buck may stop with someone else, but the buck has been through my hands. But if it is right then in this case what they don’t know will not hurt them. To me, the credit is in the job being done, not in who did it.
There is no doubt in my mind, that if I want something known, the reward is immediate. If I manage to do something and it is not known who did it, my reward is in the act itself and any possible future reward will need to wait. I often say I am not responsible for the actions of others, but I am responsible for mine.

I find that coming at it this way, means I am not dependent on the actions of other people. I do not do things dependent on their response. I do things as a result of my response. Their actions are up to them. I hope they respond in a positive way, but even when they don’t, that has never been my motivation.

It is easier to say than do. Won’t stop me trying though.