Marriage

This is an edited article by a guy called Gary Thomas whose web site is, http://www.garythomas.com/.  To me, it has nothing to do with the past, and everything to do with the future.
A divorce lawyer recently posted an article arguing that the vow “till death do us part” is passé, unrealistic, and needs to be discarded. He admitted children face some pain during divorce, but divorce is already so common, our kids need to learn that a broken family is simply part of the price you pay. This divorce lawyer is a blogger.
I’m writing from the perspective of a man who just celebrated his thirty-fifth wedding anniversary. Like most couples, Lisa and I have lived through some tough seasons in our marriage when we weren’t sure we would make it.
Reminds me of history.  There was a time when just about every citizen of Great Britain saw Nazi Germany as unstoppable.
With a last gasp of determination, England elected Winston Churchill. Churchill reset expectations: “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat….What is our aim? I can answer in one word: Victory—victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be.”
One speech was enough to get Britain going and to instil hope, but one speech wouldn’t win a war. They still had to fight. But still they remembered: never surrender.  Most experts didn’t think Great Britain could survive. But still they remembered: never surrender.
Churchill delivered another astounding speech: “We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be; we shall never surrender.”  And they didn’t.  Britain’s victory gave the entire world hope.  Historians shudder to think what could have happened next.
Spouses and individuals take up “never surrender.” They see the enemies of their family: addiction, lust, financial malfeasance, mental illness, physical ailments, and the lecherous attitude toward their marital vows, and yet they see spouses proclaim, “We shall defend our family, whatever the cost. Love instead of hate; forgive instead of resent; serve instead of tear down, encourage instead of taunt. We won’t allow anything to burn this home down.
I know a husband who had to sell his house and quit playing golf when he found out how much secret debt his wife had accumulated. He remembered: never surrender. It would take years, to crawl out of that debt, but he wasn’t going to let that debt tear his family apart. He had made a vow to keep his marriage together and he was going to keep it. He hadn’t made a vow to sustain his golf handicap, so he put first things first.
A wife helped her husband fight depression. She knew he didn’t “choose” to be depressed, and to just leave would be so easy. But she remembered: never surrender.
Another wife would tell you she probably shouldn’t have married her husband. She was pregnant. They got married. Their baby daughter had special needs. Two more children followed. There was a brief separation, but when she saw how her already troubled daughter felt even more insecure as her parents drifted apart, this wife doubled down on her marriage. Does her husband cherish her? That’s not really his thing. Do their recreational interests match up? Not even close. So many reasons to quit, but one reason to stay: she made a vow and is keeping it.
I salute these individuals and couples. They inspire, gives hope, and encourage:  Never surrender.