Love You

I’m gonna fight for you/ Even if I have to fight with you/ That’s what you gotta do/ when you love someone.  I am so not good at one part of that song. “Even if I have to fight with you”
To say it is not about physical fights is a no brainer for me.  I’ve had two in my life and lost them both.  For me, it is also not about telling someone how to live.  I reckon they need to make decisions for themselves.  So often though, I can see that some alternative would be best, but they just cannot be told.  I have always been one to just mention something in conversation.  If something is deemed to be right, it will come to light, when the time is right.
I just think of how I react when someone tells me what is best for me.  I have no doubt most people are well meaning, but the way something is said, matters more sometimes than what is said.  If something is said the wrong way, then I just get my back up.  My inclination is to refuse at the time.  That does not mean that on reflection I won’t come around.  But if I am told wrong, I will not accept it.
The last thing I want to be is like a bull in a china shop.  Bulls have no regard for anything but the goal.  Sometimes heaps of damage is done in getting to it.  There can be a lot of stuff in the china shop that does not matter to me, but it is really important to the other.  The ideal for me is that the china stays as it is, and change is achieved without breaking anything.
In the movie Shrek there was a walkway at the castle.  People were supposed to follow the maze until they were served.  Donkey was doing that.  Shrek just disregarded the ropes and took the most direct route.  It seems to me sometimes following the most direct route causes so much damage that the person trying to be reached takes flight.
I am more like Donkey.  I guess that makes me a donkey.  Where possible I prefer to preserve and change, rather than destroy and change.  This is only talking about stuff that is acknowledged would be better off changed.  There is much in my life that does not need changing.  There is much that does.  It is that stuff, that needs to be dealt with, and not the other stuff.
I need to be careful though.  Sometimes what needs to be said, needs to be said now.  I cannot assume there will be another opportunity.  Still, saying it right is more likely to achieve an acceptable outcome.
I can’t fix you/I can’t change you/but I can love you.
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