Lights, Camera, Action!

​Having written about behaviours I was trolling through some quotes on the subject and came across something was said that stopped me in my tracks. “To change a habit, make a conscience decision, then act out to the new behaviour.”
I found that interesting because I was aware when thinking about it that is what I had been doing.  Not everything is easy peasy.  Some things are hard to break.  Even with the best will in the world failure can be my companion.
When that is the case, I really do have a choice.  If I let it, things can bring me down.  I can want to give up.  I can want to declare something as too hard.  I can decide to live with something I’d really do better to live without.
There is an ad on tv at the moment that immediately came to mind. A guy is getting something to eat for someone from a bush.  His face is all swollen.  Reasonable precautions would have prevented that happening.
Like that, the absence of taking any real precautions would mean there was really only one loser.  Lil ol me.
There are definitely things that are really long standing that I would like to say good-bye to but could almost despair of ever doing.  They have been my constant companion.  Unwelcome but ever present.
Yet recently I have decided that small steps are better than no steps.  Therefore I made a conscious decision.  I decided I would starve the thing.  Instead of just trying to have a win all at once it would be an incremental win.  I had tried the “all in one go” thing and it just had not worked.  For other things yes.  For this, no.
I wanted it to be more than the absence of something.  I find a vacuum is always filled.  Unless I fill the vacuum it can be filled with what I do not want.  It is what I know as replacement.  I find that saying “I mustn’t, I mustn’t” alone always leads to I do.  Instead I say a prayer acknowledging that in some cases my power alone is insufficient.  Bitter experience has taught me that.
It is at that point I act out the new behaviour.  It is not like I am acting out a lie, it is acting out what I believe despite what my feelings may be telling me.  Eventually things align.
My replacement is a bit at a time.  Eventually the way I want to be will be more than 50%.  In the meantime celebrations are in order.  A win is a win.  Big or small it is still a win.