Letting Go

This has been a hard one for me to write about.  Not that the subject matter has been any harder than some, but I don’t want my thoughts to be thought of as a licence for me. 
The song says that “breaking up is hard to do.”  It is.  But it seems to me there is something harder to do, and that is letting go when I do not want to.  J.C Watts said “it doesn’t take a lot of strength to hang on.  It takes a lot of strength to let go.”
Letting go is incredibly counter intuitive and seen as the opposite of love rather than what it is  - the greatest expression of love.   It is not something I would ever recommend unless a person feels to do it.  I have someone to go to which helps.
I am reminded of kids when they learn to swim.  They look incredibly awkward, but they let go of the side of the pool (by jumping in) and swimming to their parent or coach.  The one they swim to is trustworthy.
There is heaps I need to let go of.  Fear and anxiety for a start.  I know harbouring them only holds me back.  Unforgiveness is another.  That is huge.  So often I can feel that another deserves all they get as long as it is not good things.  I may have legitimately suffered at the hands of another.  It seems to be though, that I am the one that suffers if I do not forgive.  For me a real test of forgiveness is legitimately wanting good things for another.  No strings attached.
Then to me there is letting go of people.  That is a biggy – for me anyway.  There is the old saying “if you love something let it go.  If it returns, it is yours and if not, it was never meant to be.”  I was engaged to a girl at one time and gave them a plant and said, “this plant is a symbol of our relationship.”  It died.  I have no idea what she is doing now.
When Merril and I were on holidays we needed an electrician to work on the place we were at.  We had our favourite group playing.  They sang two songs while he was there.  I think one was “The Sound” while the other was “Enough to Let Me Go.”  The Letting Go one talked about letting go.  The guy came to us and thought we had incredibly good music.  He was a young fella and it made me feel young again.
I reckon that what we love can be a distraction.  A good distraction mind, but still a distraction.  That sounds really wrong and un-understandable.   Fortunately, it is mostly an attitude rather than an action.  I think Joseph Campbell was right when he said, “We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”  I guess it has to do with how I came into this world and leave it.  Alone.  Anything else is in between stuff.  That is really “it’s all about me” stuff.  Sounds selfish but I reckon it is one time it is good for me.
Boy it seems like a contradiction.  Letting go of fear, anxiety, unforgiveness and people.  Basically, only everything.  Some things I never want back.  The thing is, when I legitimately let go of something, and it comes back, it always better.