Inside Job

Tonight someone used the term “inside job.”  Normally it has negative connotations.  It is seen as a bad thing.  An inside job normally infers to me that someone working for a particular organization aids someone from outside the organization, to rip it off in some way.  Normally it seems they get a part of the proceeds for assisting.
Yet I was seeing it in a different light. I saw it as someone being changed from the inside out.  Like the saying “a Leppard changing its spots.”   I did hear someone saying they had seen a Leppard change its spots.  It had spots it would sit or lie down and it changed where it went.  Not really what I had in mind.
Those that know me know I readily acknowledge I need help (thanks let’s leave it there shall we?)  I know there are things I battle that are too big for me.  It is probably uncool to say such things.
I interrupted doing this to watch “You can’t ask that.”  It was about juvenile detention. A couple of guys mentioned that by playing the game they were like big shots.  It alleviated any sense of need.  There was a sense that to survive they needed to be seen as someone not to be messed with.
To me that promotes a sense of survival but increases the need to deal with it later.  Each of the people interviewed had come to the realization that their way of survival promoted only them being on a merry-go-round of detention.
What I did find interesting is that what broke the cycle was the realization their actions affected not only themselves but others.  I did also like that I felt they gave a number of solutions a fair hearing.
For all of them change was an inside job.  My world view matched the person who asked God for a sign and the next day he was handed a flyer that said, “if you are asking God for a sign, this is it.”
To me his was the ultimate inside job. He recognised his need was more than something he alone could meet.  Making several grand a week as a kid selling drugs satisfied for a limited time.
I have never been a drug dealer or an armed robber or an inmate, but I have been an inmate on the inside.  I have found that to deal with the inside is an inside job.