Having Form

Based on what I have been reading, I am wanting to revisit balance.  I know it is a pet theme of mine but to me it is so important.
I read a sentence about elderly people claiming they are either the best of the worst people I know.  I remember saying to someone when I was twenty something that they reminded me of an aunt of mine and she was one of the nicest people I know (it was not planned but that was the right thing to say and got me brownie points.) 
I also remember sitting with a guy who told me he wanted to live to 100.  I was impressed and asked why.  I was so not expecting the response.  “I want to get back at my son.”  His desire for longevity was not to spread love and good will but vengeance.
What I have been reading talks about formation.  How we are all being formed over a lifetime.  Our everyday decisions accumulate.  Some people end up in the middle of the bell curve, but most end up at one extreme or the other.  I know that is what I see.
Change is a part of the human process.  It lasts a lifetime.  That can be hard to fathom in our instant world, yet a life develops over a lifetime.  It takes getting used to the fact that although there are things like growth spurts in life, change happens gradually.  The decisions I make, the influences I allow to influence me determine my outcome.
I am sus of cliches but I do think the saying “I am either becoming bitter or better” does have merit.  I can generally pick up fairly quickly by conversation the direction someone is going.  Often what is most important to a person is closest to the surface and does not take much if any encouragement to find expression.
That is not to say a person is locked into something.  Change or transformation is possible where someone sees the need for it and asks for help.  But if that does not occur it is a sure as night following day that a person will assume the form they are building.
What I become is my choice.  I, like all, are being formed.  What I am forming into is the question.