Hard Conversations

I read something that got me thinking about hard conversations.  It was a quote by a writer called Francine Prose. “"Sometimes being in a car, looking at the road, not having to make eye contact, is the ideal setting for heavy conversation."
To me there are at least two types of hard conversations.  An example of one is when someone close to all concerned passes away.  The preference is that the one who has gone remained, but they didn’t.  Decisions need to be made.  It is not easy, but necessary.
To me, the other type of hard conversation is when one has adopted a destructive lifestyle.  They may not see how destructive it is, but it is obvious to all others.
Compulsive gambling, overeating, smoking or unrestrained anger can have major negative effects.  Not something a person would really wish on another.  Yet all actions produce outcomes.  Good produces good, and bad produces bad.
I have engaged in these sort of conversations, with varying degrees of success.  What often happens is my motives are misunderstood and the object of the conversation uses what is said against me.  That must be seen as possible.  So often what I want to say does not come out right.  I know what I want to say and often relive what I actually did say. 
What is said though must be said in love.  It is not about setting oneself up as better than another but saying a hard truth in love out of concern for another.
What is a given though is no one will ever change unless they want to.  I as the one who sees what is happening need to be ready for whatever outcome happens.  It can be years before someone sees what may be obvious to others, and takes steps to rectify a situation.  It may be the passage of time produces undesirable outcomes.
That to me can be the hard part.  I may want what is best for another, and see the road they are walking not ending well.  But I cannot change another.  My role is to speak the truth in love, pray and hopefully see positive change – either immediately or years down the track.