Grief

Merril and I were watching an old show of Michael Parkinson in Australia.  The guy that was the first to climb My Everest.  He was from New Zealand.  He was helping to build a hospital in Kathmandu and his wife and daughter were killed fluing in.
Parkinson asked him about the grief.  I did like what he said.  He said something to the effect that it was important before, and it remains important.
It is not a rah rah topic, but it is something e all experience.  All are acquainted with grief.  It seems that like politics and taxes it is not something to talk about.  But it always amazes me how things I am encouraged not to talk about the very things I need to talk about.
The reason I should talk about such things it is the way to find a way through the maze of emotions I experience.  I am normally a fairly happy person and I do not dwell on such things but I do think to ignore it is to not have the power to deal with it in the best way possible.
There is no doubt I experience sorrow.  It is par for the course.  I may have lost a person, a marriage or a job.  What ever the cause there is sorrow.  I do reckon my response to it is so important.
I have seen those who do not let it go.  Instead of sorrow being a passing thing it is a permanent thing.  A memorial is built.  It may not be physical (though sometimes it is) but it is emotional.  I have a friend who tells me don’t mention so and so.  It is a topic that sends into a spiral years after the event.
Both Merril and I would not mention the topic and we love and pray for regularly the person concerned but we know it is time to move on.  The lingering is holding back.
I lost a brother last year and I know tears are still close to the surface.  I am not holding on but I am missing.  I am comforted to know he know he no longer suffers and is in the baest place he could be but I miss him.
Having said that it was like his demise opened up so many doors for me.  There is no doubt in my mind that if he were still here I would be doing what I was doing and attending to him.
I miss him but I have moved on.  I really feel that to deal with anything unpleasant I heed to respond correctly and move on.  I do not believe any experience need be a show stopper.  But it could be if I let it.
I do not like grief.  I am happy it will one day be a thing of the past.  But right now it is a thing of the present.  For me it is not a place to stop but a place to pass through.