Friends

I have a book of quotes that I pulled out the other day to have a look at.
I am not one to quote a cliché without thinking about it.  Just because it is a popular saying does not make it true.  To me there are quotes that I immediately take to as I see that everything said is my experience.  Others it seems to me contain the truth but may not be the whole truth.  Not for me anyway.  In cases like that if it is something I think is close to what I think, I will tweak it.
There was a quote in Atomic Habits I really liked.  It was said by Lao Tzu. “Men are born soft and supple; dead they are stiff and hard.  Plants are born tender and pliant; dead they are brittle and dry.  Thus whoever is stiff and inflexible is a disciple of death.  Whoever is soft and yielding is a disciple of life.  The hard and stiff will be broken.  The soft and supple will prevail.”
That to me does not promote being jelly like, but promotes not being so closed as to miss out on something that rings true but comes from an unexpected source.  The inability to accept something because it does not fit within my dogma is a hardening.  I don’t know who said it but I think, “the same sun that melts the snow hardens the clay.”
I really like “a true friend never gets in your way, unless you happen to be going down” by an Arnold H Glasow.  To me speaking the truth in love can be hard.  I may even think it might be better left unsaid.  But I do not think so when I care and want what is best for someone.  Though it is never a nagging thing.  I know I get my back up when something is attempted to be forced on me.  Why should others be any different?
It is very easy to be misunderstood.  Hard truth can be hard to take.  And really it has to be said in the right way.  Even that does not guarantee not being misunderstood.  It seems to me a bit like what the Sicilian proverb means when it says, “only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.”
Again I do not know where I heard it but I am fond of saying, “the definition of a friend is, someone who, when you make a mistake, does not think you have done a permanent job.”  I reckon welcome to the human race.  We all make mistakes and we all need a helping hand.