Disguise

It never ceases to amaze me how a turn of phrase sometimes grabs me.  Most things I hear and assess while some things that grab me, I really assess.  The phrase that grabbed me was “stumbling on my disguise.”
That does not mean I wander around in a state of disbelief until I prove otherwise if I can it does mean that I am not inclined to quote stuff I can prove true or otherwise, unless I know it to be true.
Why I like that phrase is most of my life I spend wandering around in disguise.  It is not that I am not true to myself and those around me, but it is that I seldom let people see what difficulties I may be going through.  From time to time I may give a glimpse, but it is only with some or at special times I declare a certain area of me may need work.
Occasionally I watch the History channel and it seems to have a lot of war stories.  I am reminded of those that get wounded and need a hospital.  Their life depends on them getting the treatment they need.  That may be a seeming inconvenience, but to those around saving a friend’s life is not an inconvenience.
A change of strategy may be needed but the goal remains the same. Defeating an enemy while avoiding a loss of life on my side.  That can be easier said than done, but what is desirable at the start is desirable at the finish.
I have no desire to hold others back, but I still have the same desire I always had.  I know if it was not me but one of my companions it would be what I want for them.  As far as I am concerned, we are all in this together.  We all have the same goal.  I bring something needed.  I have a role to play.
Any operation I have ever seen always contains no one who is surplus to requirements.  It matters not if it is seen as a key role or a make up the numbers role.  Even in make up the numbers roles I always notice when someone is not there.  The amazing thing is even if a role is seen as a make up the numbers role it is really a key role.
Any building built needs the likes of plumbers, concreters, planners, builders, and labourers to name a few.  Take away anyone and the building is incomplete.
I used to find it fascinating on the walk into town to work, looking at construction sites.  I would know how big the building planned was, by the depth of the foundations.  Big holes in the ground meant big buildings.
Just like in war or construction it seems that anything superfluous is counterproductive.  It seems in my life to it is best I deal with the superfluous and what may work against my achieving my goal.  At the right time and place I need to get rid of the extra weight of my disguise.