Assuming the Best

I really do feel the way being talked about in the latest James Clear email – though I do put one proviso on it.
I reckon I need real discernment when it comes to people.  I very much believe in seeing the best in people, but I refuse to be naive.   This may sound terrible, but I think there is a truth here that can be applied to this situation.  I have heard someone say, “just because you are paranoid does not mean no one is after you.”
It is so easy to be lead by my prejudice – to think the way I feel is the way it is.  In some instances nothing could be further from the truth, while in others a warning bell sounds that I do well to listen to.  I do not mean rush out and declare something but to weigh it up and take heed to the opinion of other respected ones.
Having said that I do think I can be often too quick to assess a situation based on my own negative feelings and experiences.  It is so easy to assume to worst when it is like a mate of mine says, “he’s just trying to hustle up  a living like the rest of us.”
In other words, sometimes something is said that I misunderstand or misconstrue.  It may be a manifestation of a thought being fought but unsuccessfully resisted at that time.  I do not know how many times I have said something that was not really the way I felt.  It was something I was battling for sure but was my worst self and can only un-necessarily pull another down.  Often when said, that is the lead argument of another, and the spiral continues and deteriorates.
Anyway a former CEO of Pepsi, Indra Nooyi said, “"Whatever anybody says or does, assume positive intent. You will be amazed at how your whole approach to a person or problem becomes very different.
When you assume negative intent, you're angry. If you take away that anger and assume positive intent, you will be amazed. Your emotional quotient goes up because you are no longer almost random in your response. You don't get defensive. You don’t scream. You are trying to understand and listen because at your basic core you are saying, "Maybe they are saying something to me that I'm not hearing." So assume positive intent has been a huge piece of advice for me…
If you react from a negative perspective – because you didn’t like the way they reacted – then it just becomes two negatives fighting each other. But when you assume positive intent, I think often what happens is the other person says, "Hey, wait a minute, maybe I’m wrong in reacting the way I do because this person is really making an effort."
The outlook can definitely seem Pollyanna like, but it has made a huge difference for me.